• I sit carelessly on the stiff chair. The metal legs make a clicking sound against the hard floor. I look down on the paper in front of me and make a paper airplane. Bending the corners and measuring the sides, i fold the homework and chuck it across the class. No one cares. I look around. People huddle in groups and talk of inane bullshit they saw or heard that they think is funny and might impres others. I roll my eyes in a bitchy manner. No one cares. I look at the ceiling and start counting the titles. Six, eight, forty-eight, plus some other tiles in the corner. Fifty-six. I am out of things to do. No one cares. I stand up and aproach a group. They are flashing their utra-cool cellphones with the little ‘B’ blinking on their screens. Probably some trite bullshit of a chick sticking a dildo up her ass. Who cares? No one, including me. I want to say something but everyone is too much busy looking at their Nokias, with some pansy jumping around on the TFT screen. I don’t care, and go back to my seat. I stare at my watch and the class won’t end for another 30 minutes. The teacher left and is probably doing coke lines in the bathroom, because i wsure would if I taught a class full of rich idiots. I begin to think of hot’n’sexy. Damn i want to tit bang her. Then my train of though stops at a stop called Future. What is waiting for me in the future? The hell am i to do after college. What college is it going to be? Damn, she got into Harvard. What the hell? I want to be accepted to Harvard just so i can send them a rejection letter. I wonder how many of those they’ve gotten. What the hell would be my major? Economics? Law? Forestry? Basket weaving? Definitely not law.
  • I doze off for a while. I wake up. No one cares. How much time has passed? Is the class going to end any time soon. Everyone is still watching the damn 3gp video. I remember my train. Right, my future job. I decide.
  • Being the epitome of cool, awesome, intelect, and wit that i think know i am, i decide to become… *gasp* *a child’s cry*… The Authority on everything.
  • That’s right, i will become an authority on everything and everyone. Anyone has a question, a doubt, an idea? Bring it to me and i will decide if it is bullshit. I imagine sitting on a great hill, with clouds beneath my feet. People from all around the world come to see me and hear me out. Philosophers, lawyers (no not lawyers), doctors, teachers, peasents, anyone. They bring me their troubles and issues and i hear it. I think for a minute, sitting with my thumb up my ass. I say smething equally mind-boggling, witty, funny, and revolutionary. The man bows and leaves.
  • “What is the meaning of life?” a man asks.
  • “Nothing, dickface.”
  • Whoa, that would kick ass. Maybe then these dipshits won’t waste time prancing around during TOK class with their Bluetooth on, arguing with me about morals and ethics. Who the hell do they think they are? Aristotle? Sophocles? Screw you! I am the authority. I am the one who knows everything.
  • You need to know who is wrong or who is right? Ask me, I know.
  • I won’t charge a cent, besides the $2000 entrence fee, and am willing to finally hear you out, you sad fuck.
  • Go ahead. Sign up now, and get a free blender.