• Man, i just realized what a stupid bitch Tyra Banks is. What a haughty whore. (Ooooh, assonance.) Anyways, i was just sitting home as usual doing nothing, probably watching Transformers or playing Tetris, when my mom called for me to watch American’s Next Top Model. All i heard were just screams coming from the TV and so i watched it out of sheer shits and giggles. It was the part when they eliminate the chiks, which is always fun.
  • Anyways, the last two chiks stand before her and they know one of them is going to get kicked the fuck out. Tyra stands there talking about her banal bullshit, and then says that both of the chiks are going home. By this time, i am thinking this is fucking awesome. She just totally fucked the two chiks over. One of the chiks (let’s call her white, because i am a bigoted and racist dumbass) went to all her friends and started crying like they all do, but not the other chik (ms. black). Ms. Black went to all her friends and just laughed it off. Then, Tyra calls them back up and tells Ms. White that she liked her reaction, but not Ms. Black’s, because as i understand, she wants the chiks to cry to elevate her self-importance and see that people actually care about her dumbass show no one cares about.
  • At this point, i am thinking, “fuck you!” but these were daisies compared to what came next. The balck chik said something about not really caring about the things that she can’t change, and so, doesn’t see the point in crying, and besides, she said she didn’t feel like she was going to accomplish anything anyways. Then, she said something that was probably just meant to piss Tyra off for being the mouth-breathing dipshit that she is. This is when Tyra morfed into Ultar-Bitch. She began screaming like a castrated monkey in heat, with blood and spit going all over.
  • I had to call bullshit on this. I didn’t really care what happened after that because i was too damn brain numb. Who the fuck does Tyra think she is? What does she think she does with her show? They are fucking models, the dumbest chiks of the lot. All you need is to stand in front of a camera! But she tries to show it off like a fucking challenge, almost comparing her job to neuro-surgery. And what does she have to yell about? She kept yelling about how this show is important to the girls and should be to Ms. Black as well, because it is such an important profession in the human spectre of humanitarianism. I mean what the fuck does this job do anyways? They are fucking models. All they do is add titties, elegance, and hotness to products i don’t need so they can pass it off as something dire. I mean what the fuck? Why can’t the product sell itself? If i wanted the product, i would buy it myself, and i don’t need your flying feathers, fancy make-up, and push-up bras to let me realize that i need it. FUCK YOU, FASHION INDUSTRY!
  • Is Tyra curing cancer? Is she benefiting the society in any way? What does she do, that stupid shit? Nothing! There isn’t even a charity she attends or any way that she helps people with all of the money dumbass corporate marketing managers throw at her to sell their ultra-shimmering, liquid lipstick. Fuck you, mr. marketing manager. Is she fucking solving the problem with world disasters, solving mathematical conundrums that could solve prostate cancer, or even posing nude for men to beat the monkey to? NO! All she is doing is standing in a palitable pose that can sell some shitty product i don’t need. Fuck you Tyra Banks!
  1. I don’t need your stupid products
  2. Your elegant poses won’t make me want to buy it
  3. No one cares about modeling, well at least until they are twelve
  4. The show is bullshit as is the fashion industry and modeling
  5. You have no right to yell at anybody because you don’t deserve to breath and use up my oxygen
  6. You are a selfish, haughty, pretencious, and hypocritical bitch
  7. Fuck you
  8. I hate you

I wish the destruction of the following things:

  • Tyra Banks
  • Fashion industry
  • Fashion TV
  • Modeling
  • Models
  • Ads with nothing but elegant chiks standing and wearing the product
  • The bullshit products
  • Ultra-shimmering liquid lipstick
  • Tyra Banks

I think i just popped some major artery from being so pissed