• “What’s your name again?” which is usually said after makeout or any sexual interaction.
  • “Are you a girl?”
  • “Nice pubis you got…” while pointing at the said pubis.
  • “And your name be”
  • “I only go out on dates when my parole officer is on vacation”
  • “So, if one chinese man said that all chinese people lie, and he himself is chinese, then he just lied, which means that chinese people don’t lie, and being chinese himself, then he told the truth, meaning that all chinese people lie, but being a chinese himself…”
  • “I can count up to eleventeen”
  • “Me penis has a macropenis growing on it and that one has a micropenis growing on it, and so forth.”
  • “Would you like to see my aggregate demand and supply curve?” while winking profusely.
  • “I don’t believe i saw you here before. My name is Catherine.”
  • “Ho-Ho-Ho, i have a Po.”
  • “I am a Rabbi. I only ate pork once, but it didn’t count, because i was too drunk anyways… and the prostitute gave it to me anyways, and besides i lost my house on roulette, so it didn’t really count.”
  • “I invented the question mark.”
  • “I am allergic to pretty people,” approach, sniff, and smile in relief.
  • “I am not bald–i am just taller than my hair.”
  • “I counted to infinity… twice.”
  • “My name is ‘is’, but friends call me Charlie.”
  • “Who goes there, fish-breath?”
  • “Wait till i tell this to Bob,” and then give an air high-five to no one and then laugh uncontrollably, while pretending to pat someone on the back.
  • “I once ate my whole tongue… it tastes delicious.”
  • “I am not into beer or vodka, i just drink Molotov cocktails.”